It's that turning point again that I am to decide whether to continue my losing streak or start again and make it better-er this time.
I feel that I don't deserve to share anything because my example is imperfect. I feel that I am know nothing of change because I go back to my old self every time I see a single improvement (or when people notices something). Finally, I don't feel I deserve a second chance.
These raw emotions take the best of me and I let myself be pulled down to depression when I don't start early everyday or on Sundays - I'd be sucky and wouldn't start the day at all. I'd try again the following day and there I am again - hating myself for not waking up early enough to start my day perfect. Then it accumulates and I would have a negative, unhealthy idea of myself. I would continue the losing streak with my day, being nervous about the day for not start it right, letting time just pass while I just worry about it. I am moving, getting myself myself busy but aimless - moving into nothing.
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